Shift Changes are both good and bad…

Shift Changes are both good and bad…

My husband had his work schedule get changed on him again, so now he works 1:30 to 10:00PM. Which means that I am suddenly working mornings for the first time since I went back to work when B was 7 months old. I wasn’t sure how I felt about this…it cuts down on the time I am home with B during the day, and it’s hard to not be there when she wakes up, when she’s eating breakfast and lunch, when she goes down for her nap. I feel even less like a stay-at-home mom now, even more like a working mom. 

It’s silly, since I am probably going to be working about the same number of hours, and if you subtract the two hour nap B takes during the day, I’m really spending about the same amount of time with her as I was before…maybe an hour less. But it feels like a LOT less time. I miss her little face all day long.

One good thing is that I get her AFTER her afternoon nap now…when she’s all bubbly and energetic and ready to play. That’s new. Most of our mornings are pretty mellow, with just a little playing and a lot of sleepy grumpiness and breakfast and lunch and naps. Afternoons are her I AM AWAKE time, and now, for the first time in a long time, I get to enjoy that more than twice a week on my days off. And that has been wonderful and refreshing. I feel closer to her than I have in a couple of months. It’s hard for me to enjoy my time with her when I’m trying to stick to a schedule so I can get ready for work and get her out the door. Coming home from work and spending unhurried and relaxed time with her has been a nice change.

The other BIG, HUGE, GINORMOUSLY WONDERFUL change is that I am home for bedtime. Nearly every night! (Two days a week, when D is off of work, I am still occasionally working the late shift.) For those of you who have followed my blog from the beginning (way back when we were still MisAdventures of a New Mom), you’ll know that’s a HUGE deal for me. I am SO happy to have the chance to once again have that special time before bedtime with my girl. Bathtime, storytime, bedtime…it’s mine again! I get to snuggle her close and recite the Muppet Babies Nightlight book from memory while she turns the glowing pages for me. I get to rock her and sing to her and tell her I love her and have her snuggle into me like I’m the most comfortable place to sleep in the whole world, and I get to do it five days out of seven, at minimum. I am so grateful.

This may not be a permanent shift for David, so this may just be for a few weeks, but even if it is, I’m going to enjoy every minute of it that I can…and try not to think about the sleepy morning routines that I’m saying goodbye to for now. It is so hard for me…I feel like I need to have it all and I can’t! There’s not enough hours in the day. I can’t have mornings with her AND nights, and that’s just not fair. I want both, and afternoons and overnights, too! 🙂 But at least I have time with her. At least I have a happy, healthy, well-loved little girl.

Ack! I always revert to complaining. I’m a stay-at-home mom at heart, what can I say?! I’ll try to be good.

I will say that when I got home from that first early shift and my mother-in-law brought her to the door and Briana saw me getting out of the car and started waving and wiggling to get down, and she came straight to me once I was inside, and I scooped her up and gave her a hug and she wrapped her little arms around my neck and then planted a big ole kiss on me when she pulled back…that made my heart smile. Moments like that make my world go ’round. The best part of being a mom is getting to experience that level of pure love. Uncomplicated and overwhelming. It’s amazing.

Anyway, I’m getting tired…and I have to work in the morning!

I’ll try to get a blog up again a little after Christmas to talk about our Christmas adventures. We’re going to try to take B for Santa Claus pictures this weekend!

First Steps

First Steps

My daughter took her first solo steps today. I had said just yesterday that I was sure she would walk before the end of the year, and now she has. Three steps from a chair to me, and I am so happy and proud of her. I know it’s not a lot of steps, but she did it all on her own, with her arms stretched toward me and a smile on her beautiful face.

I don’t think she understood why I grabbed her up and danced around the room with her while saying in a sing song voice “you did it you did it you did it” or why my eyes were full of happy tears, or why I couldn’t stop kissing her face…but she smiled and laughed and clapped and said “Mama! Hi, mama!”

D didn’t get to see it, which made me a little sad, but we called him with FaceTime on my iPhone, and he was so happy to hear it. He’s been miserably sick the last few days, so hearing happy news was good for him, it brought a big smile.

I was hoping B would walk to D when he got home, but it was nap time and she wasn’t interested. Oh, well. He will get to see her take wobbly steps toward him while she grins and reaches for daddy soon enough.

I was so afraid I would miss these steps, this milestone in particular was important to me and I was afraid I would be at work. I am so happy I saw her walk for the first time, that I was there and didn’t have to hear about it from someone else. I just wish D had been home, too.

One Happy Mama